Self-care and wellness are vital to our well-being, allowing us to care for our loved ones with the best versions of ourselves, especially after an exceptionally challenging week. My dear friend, Mommy Panda, and I decided we desperately needed to unwind, escaping the constant demands of caring for everyone else. And so, we found ourselves at the enchanting Terranea Resort, nestled along the picturesque California coastline.
Mommy Panda, always mindful of her family's needs, often struggled with the guilt of spending time and money on herself. However, the irresistible $50 per person deal! She discovered for this charcuterie feast and access to the resort's lavish grounds felt like a justifiable indulgence – a small price to pay for a much-needed respite and a chance to recharge.
The resort's meticulously manicured grounds cascaded down a coastal bluff, where the salty sea air filled our lungs. In the distance, a lively band played rock music, but our hearts were drawn to the soothing melodies of an acoustic guitar singer-songwriter by the poolside. We indulged in a delectable spread of charcuterie, cheeses, and (a satisfying sip of) wine, savoring every moment of this luxurious escape.
Taking time to ease our worries, connect, and reflect is essential to self-care, allowing us to return to our loved ones re-energized and ready to give our best. Whether it's a luxurious getaway or a simple hour of quiet contemplation, self-care and wellness are vital in ensuring we can be truly present for our families.
As summer draws to a close and families prepare for the impending school year, Mommy Panda wanted to have one last hurrah to ease the transition into rigid routines and unpreferred school work for Little P and Cool Cat C. So, the last weekend before the first day of school, Mommy Panda planned another beach day, this time with Little P’s friend from one of her therapy centers, Little G. Cool Cat C was not too keen on hanging out with her little sister and her friend so she stayed with Daddy Dog for the day for some daddy / daughter time. The day that we were planning on going to the beach, Little P also had a piano lesson so Mommy Panda asked me to start packing the non-perishable beach gear the night before so they would be ready to leave once they got back from piano class and changed into their beach clothes.
Little P’s piano lesson went off without a hitch, as they moved to a bigger room that wasn’t so claustrophobic and stuffy and had a wall mirror. We always joke that Little P is a little bit vain because she loves looking at herself in the mirror to watch herself sing, dance and now play the piano. Mommy Panda positioned the mirror behind the piano so that Little P would not be tempted to leave her piano bench.
Once Mommy Panda and Little P got home, and I arrived at the house I started making some croissant sandwiches for lunch at the beach with ingredients that I picked up the day before. After putting on their swimsuits and packing the last couple of essentials, more snacks, we were on the road. As mentioned in my last “Beach Bunnies” blog post, Little P has little patience for waiting when she can see the beach, while we weren’t trying to find anywhere to park, this time we were waiting in line to turn left into the beach parking lot.
However, once at the beach, Mommy Panda found Little P’s mood dramatically improved and met Little G and his mom! I joined them shortly afterward with the rest of the stuff from the car. After eating lunch and making sure everyone was covered from head to toe with an ample amount of sunscreen, the kids were finally allowed to play in the water under my watchful eye while their moms took a much-needed break within eyesight.
Little G’s mom and Mommy Panda chatted about the benefits of transitioning to the Self-Determination Program (SDP). Like many parents, Little G’s mom is apprehensive about how much work, time, and emotional process of writing a PCP and getting additional IPP services approved by the Regional Center would be involved in transitioning their child to SDP. Mommy Panda reassured Little G’s mom that if she chose to use Clover Advocates as her Independent Facilitator to support Little G’s transition to SDP, Mommy Panda and her team, the Clovers, would be able to support her throughout the whole process, from PCP to ongoing Independent Facilitator services. And if she didn’t want to work with Clover Advocates, then she would recommend other IFs that may be a better fit. Little G’s mom opted to go with Clover Advocates because Mommy Panda had already given her some great advice about Traditional Regional Center services that she wasn’t taking advantage of even before Little G’s transition to SDP.
After the kids were done playing in the water, we decided to get some food at a nearby food stand and we learned that little P tolerated eating fried fish when Mommy Panda ordered some fish and chips! Mommy Panda had expected to eat the fish while Little P ate just the fries, but she surprised us all by eating almost all of the fried fish! She probably thought they were chicken nuggets or were very hungry, but a win is a win! Neither Little P nor Cool Cat C had ever eaten fish before! When all the food was eaten and the children sufficiently nourished, we walked back to our cars, said our goodbyes, and headed home.
On the ride home, Mommy Panda shared that talking to Little G’s mom about the SDP transition process reminded her of her own hesitation with taking the plunge to transition both Little P and Cool Cat C to SDP at the same time, with just 1 month between their SDP transition dates. However, after all the blood, sweat, and tears it took to transition them to the SDP, she is so happy that she did as they were able to take advantage of so many services she could not have under Traditional Regional Center funding.
My morning routine includes listening to some classical music on Spotify while checking email and then my Facebook feed on my phone. Recently, I’ve discovered Humor in Autism Facebook group, which has gotten me through some good days and bad. Because sometimes if I don’t laugh, then I’ll cry.
Here are some of my morning Facebook Wisdoms that helps you to know that you are not alone!
I drink my first cup of coffee in bed, then the second cup after I get downstairs for breakfast and finally my 3rd cup in the afternoon after lunch... depending how many times Little P wakes up the previous night!
Some parents sleep train for a month, some parents sleep train for a year...I did it for 5 years with Little P, and she still only needs 6 hours of sleep!
The Matrix ❌
My Life ✅
My children don't mean to give me a difficult time, they are just trying to communicate their needs the only way they know how.
It's ok to take a break and ask for help.
One day my kids will get easier, so I tell myself everyday.
So many challanging days, and so many joyful ones too!
I need to create an enviroment for my neurodivergent children to thrive, and not force them to mask in a typical world when they are atypical.
Just when I think I can't get up, I muster the strength to give some more.